Sunday, January 20, 2008

Uptone beat

I'll start by saying today I’m going to be more upbeat, although this is a place for me to simply be, today I feel more intoned with the ones I care for, therefore I’ll write in a more, lets say how you see me kind of way.(Or how I present myself, argument works both ways :P)
Today I want to talk about the small moments of distraction in life, the moments that aren't part of the main story, the ones that don't define you in any way, but you are still present in them.
Like when you're down people have a tendency to try picking you up, if they care that is, getting you out, and making you breath fresh air. Like everyone else, I feel this is a pointless exercise; things are as they are, and putting them on hold doesn't really solve anything. When you are back in your room, with you thoughts, you still need to face yourself again. Still these moments, these fillers of your life, that connect the major dots, the big events, are part of you, and in my case a big part of me. It's when I make an unconscious difference, where I am more honest, where I play fewer games, where I forget to be myself, after all you are trying to be there, otherwise you are just stuck in your head... and that is another story.
Others do help, not directly, but in the way you see them, how you can be there, how you can help, even without their knowledge...
Once, not long ago, I’ve been told by one of the most important people in my life, don't take yourself out of the world, you have too much to give to it...
Honestly I know I am normally full of it, so this is one of those statements that goes straight to my ego, but honestly sometimes I don't see it, you need to be in the world to see it, to feel the world around you, to make it to the place that allows you to be there for others.
I don't have any problems around others; I don't hide behind a screen to talk about stuff, even though you might think so considering you are reading this. I don't like talking openly about myself, and I don't here, you get what you want to get, as in real life. (I do know in real life I make it harder, you have to real it want it, here it’s for free :P)
But I do have a unique perspective for life, might not be unique, perhaps unique in my reality, my world, and the worlds I reach. I know it is a valued view, and for that I have to feel grateful, to be able to touch so much... Anyway, I just want to state for those who care, I am here if you need me, I can pause my life at any time, sometimes I think my life is these pauses, these moments, these links between things that never come to be, at least for me...
I was about to write about the non upbeat stuff, so I am stopping my typing at least for now...

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