Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Abstract talks

Well this is an interesting topic for me, as I recur to abstract talking quite often, especially in delicate topics. I think it is a very simple way to talk about things without really talking, why would we put ourselves through hard situations if we can avoid them? Think about it, if you can get the same information without having to commit any of yourself in the process, why not? Indeed why, for me it is a clearly the safest approach to any hard conversation, and a way that allows you to rearrange your arguments in real time creating ways to get away from the topic at any time, after all it is obviously just abstract :P.
There is a problem with this, let's say tool, it becomes tricky to handle when your mind start to drift in the world of "what ifs". When you talk in abstract, chances are the other person will follow your lead, as such everything said is open to interpretation. Mostly we know what all means, and we can read it clearly, but when we wonder, things are that simple, you start second guessing yourself and that's when the shit hits the fan.
The more feelings you have in a abstract conversation, the more likely it is to fail. Don't get me wrong, you'll be able to finish it and get some conclusions. The problem is put to the test of time, these conclusions get weak and you second guess them, it can become a vicious cycle if you use this tool again.
The thing I really wanted to point out is the huge advantage of this when you trust your judgment, and don't get tricked by your own idealism.
Talking in abstract allow you to understand even yourself, without understanding a thing. Talk to everyone, and address no one, something we all understand without understanding anyone.
The comfort of knowing we agree, when in reality we might be agreeing upon different things.
Getting a clear conscious, without having to apologize, after all they got what we meant didn't they? :P
A tool that allows you to move on, without discussing the sordid details, and when applied with some distance of feelings, by bridging the gaps for ourselves we are able to achieve the comfort of our own views. Which in the end might be not exactly reality, but what is real anyway :P
That would be another story....

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