The internet...

Well today I am writing about this fabulous creation, this network of shared knowledge and resources. Some theorized that this tool improves the quality and efficiency of work. These people have no idea what they are talking about :P.
Communication wise the internet is provides a solid background for communication tools, such as skype, MSN, etc. These when used appropriatly give you easy and immediate access to people that might be abble to answer questions that you might have. For example a ex college that did something similar. The funny thing is, although this is true, it is only true under a solid social network, which as everybody knows takes time to build, and specially takes time to maintain. The fact of the matter is most communications are mainly social. Another example of this are emails, another great tool, but I want to pose a question how many social or social based (funny emails, facebook(ohh don't get me started on those :P), etc.) emails do you get a day? How about the work emails? Don't see this as an attack on the internet, I would not be able to work without it, the work mails are fundamental and as such not dismissible, but how much time do you lose on the other type?
And then there is the boredom, when you are bored with work, well you have a fun world in front of you, I mean the imagination is the limit you can find everything, online games, news, TV programs, blogs ;P, seriously there is no end, there is no end to the internet... Although a friend of mine told me once otherwise, but I think he meant that there weren't enough football news being released a minute.
Easy information, free information, shared knowledge, well all is great but how do we contain ourselves from abusing it? It is amazing the amount of work one does considering this temptation ;P.
Well I guess I let the porn slip on this post, that would deserve its own post, and to be fair nobody does it on the job, perhaps an email or so but you know how it goes ;P.
To end in a high note check what some think ;P



P.S. - I thought about give useful links for, let's say finding more of the internet ;P but well I don't want to spoiled you efficiency :P

Papercut...

A short post, who doesn't relate to this at times?

Why does it feel like night today?
Something in here's not right today
Why am I so uptight today?
Paranoia's all I got left
I don't know what stressed me first
or how the pressure was fed/but
I know just what it feels like
To have a voice in the back of my head

It's like a face that I hold inside
A face that awakes when I close my eyes
A face that watches everytime I lie
A face that laughs every time I fall
(And watches everything)
So I know that when it's time to sink or swim
The face inside is here in me/right underneath my skin

It's like I'm/paranoid lookin' over my back
It's like a/whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I/can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like the face inside is right beneath my skin

I know I've got a face in me
Points out all the mistakes to me
You've got a face on the inside too and
Your paranoia's probably worse
I don't know what set me off first but I know what I can't stand
Everybody acts like the fact of the matter is
I can't add up to what you can
But everybody has a face that they hold inside
A face that awakes when I close my eyes
A face that watches everytime they lie
A face that laughs everytime they fall
(And watches everything)
So you know that when it's time to sink or swim
That the face inside is watching you too/right inside your skin

It's like I'm/paranoid lookin' over my back
It's like a/whirlwind, inside of my head
It's like I/can't stop, what I'm hearing within
It's like the face inside is right beneath the skin

It's like I'm/paranoid lookin' over my back
It's like a/whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I/can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like the face inside is right beneath my skin

(The face inside is right beneath your skin)
(The face inside is right beneath your skin)
(The face inside is right beneath your skin)

The sun goes down
I feel the light betray me
The sun goes down
I feel the light betray me

(The sun)
It's like I'm/paranoid looking over my back
It's like a/whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I/can't stop what I'm hearing within
(I feel the light betray me)
It's like the face inside is right beneath your skin
(The sun)
It's like I'm/paranoid looking over my back
It's like a/whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I/can't stop what I'm hearing within
(I feel the light betray me)
It's like I/can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like I/can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like the face inside is right beneath my skin

The hesitation before action...

Today a more serious topic, it can't all about humor and parties.
Some say that hesitating is a sign of weakness, of lack of backbone, that if you hesitate you lose the boat. Well it is true that this might happen but then again you might find that you boarded the wrong boat (And next stop is nowhere ;P).
For some reason the word hesitation has a kind of bad connotation, don't get me wrong it is not bad, but it is one of those words you have difficulties using in a positive context.
The think is hesitation is part of most decision making processes, the need to second guess yourself to understand other scenarios and their own implications. From my perspective sometimes we can't hesitate, but that is more about gut feeling than it is about being a rational human being. I praise logic, but at the end of the day it can't justify a deadlock on your actions simply because of certain uncertainties (eheheh, putting those two words together is quite an achievement ;P).
Hesitation comes from the unknown, and since we can't know everything, it is present in most of our actions. But at the end of the day one should be pragmatic about it, you can't hesitate forever, and after all inaction is just another form of action.

Nottingham Nightlife : Student Monday...

All paths lead to Oceana, basically you can't go wrong, if you are not a student, well find a way to be one because this is the place to be on a Monday night. Honestly, it is simply party central.
If you are a curious researcher, as I am, it is also the place to be. Why? Well it is the perfect place to study the social dynamics of the English culture. One of the examples is the dress code, or should I say absence of one. But don't think this is bad and people go sloppy, actually it is the opposite most people, particular girls, simple dress to impress. The size of the skirts makes you question if they can be called skirts, or if they are simply slightly oversize belts. They go with dresses, with lingerie, with costumes, well pretty much they want to stand out, and they do :P. Well if you think the boys are different, well guess again...
Another interesting aspect for studying is the mating rituals (and here the word actually applies). There are two distinct periods in the night, the first is between ten and midnight, that is the girls on the prowl time. During this period the ratio between boys and girls is astonishing, at least, and really at the very least 5 girls to 1 boy. And if you think it is because the place is empty, well think again, it is packed... For a southern European, this is way to early to be in the club, but well worth it, because you don't hunt them, they hunt you ;P.
The second period starts around half midnight, where the ratio equalizes and at times slightly tilts, and i mean slightly. During this period the men have arrived and lost all their normal inhibitions due to the effect of alcohol in their systems. Thus they proceed with the amazing mating procedure, they go behind the girl, dance ever so slightly, put their hands on their waste, the girl looks back, if she says "no", the guy takes the hand off and moves to the next one, if she says nothing, well 5 minutes and their are making out ;P. Although this is a slight exaggeration, it is not a big one, the thing is not even with alcohol some of the guys can do it, but it is quite frequent to see it happening around you. Obviously for the purpose of doing research you might try it out to see if it works for you ;P. I could go on, talk about the Baywatch, but I think that deserves its own post ;P. Just trust me, if you can simply go there ;).
Last piece of advice, do not, I repeat, do NOT talk much in a club to a girl (in England), or when you blink they are already gone ;P.

A song that makes them while, at least at the moment... ;P



... guaranteed fun ;)

Chinese and Pigeons...

Chinese and Pigeons what do these have in common, well this one I heard last Friday and I just had to share :P. Please keep in mind this is a joke so don't get emotional about this ;P.
So apparently, or at least according to someone's views, Chinese are just like Pigeons, they are in every big city, they multiply more than the average, etc.
Honestly I heard a lot of jokes about Chinese, but on Friday this just made me laugh a lot more than usual ;P.
Here is something to complete the post, more jokes enjoy ;P:

The Fisherman...

Well there we go a post on fisherman again, actually I don't recall if I mentioned it before but I think I did. What I didn't know is that this is a quite common illness for all PhD students, not the day dreaming of becoming a fisherman but the dreaming to do something simpler, the wishing for a simpler life. The thing is I don't think that the problems that I am solving are that complex, but the fact that I have to solve them in a formal and descriptive way, well it just tires me out even before I started doing it. The knowledge that it is not as simple as it appears to be, and that I will find problems in the details, just puts me off of it. It is like if I don't start the problems don't really exist because on generic terms I know what needs to be done. On the other hand the feeling of being useless sets in, and thus the need to dream about practical work one could do, something that you would see the results, and without any hidden problems (this might be a exaggeration, there are always hidden problems, then again that might be my PhD side of the brain talking ;P).
For me it is to be a fisherman, I guess partly for my cultural history, which also entails my love for the ocean. The fact that I am in Nottingham doesn't help due to the absence of the ocean. All in all a hut by the sea sounds like a good plan today, and most days of a PhD life. A friend from Thailand knowing about this sent me this:



Seams lonesome, but nice... And simple...

All of this reminded me of a great song enjoy...



I’m all at sea
Where no one can bother me
Forgot my roots
If only for a day
Just me and my thoughts
Sailing far away

Like a warm drink it seeps into my soul
Please just leave me right here on my own
Later on you could spend some time with me
If you want to, all at sea

I’m all at sea
Where no-one can bother me
I sleep by myself
I drink on my own
I don’t speak to nobody
I gave away my phone

Like a warm drink it seeps into my soul
Please just leave me right here on my own
Later on you could spend some time with me
If you want to, all at sea

Now I need you more than ever
I need you more than ever now

If you don’t need it every day
But sometimes don’t you just crave
To disappear within your mind
You never know what you might find
So come and spend some time with me
And we will spend it all at sea

Like a warm drink it seeps into my soul
Please just leave me right here on my own
Later on you could spend some time with me
If you want to, all at sea

Ooooh
If you want to, all at sea
If you want to


Simply great...

Mate...

So today's topic is yet again related to the British culture. The word "mate" is one of those words that the Brits just love to use (much like cheers, but that is another story that does disturb me, but in a different way :P). Some background knowledge first.
When I first came to England, not as a tourist(in that capacity things are not so clear to you), I notice that people kept calling me "mate", like "thanks mate" or "cheers mate". This was a bit odd for me, because I always associated the word mate, to the mating, which is clearly not what they were intending it as, or at least one hopes it was not ;P. So this obviously required me to do some digging on the meaning of the word, and a simple Google search provides you with 22 definitions for it. 22 come on, I know they try to simplify the language but this just drains all meaning from the word, after all you can mean whatever. Check it out:

1. husband or wife; spouse.
2. one member of a pair of mated animals.
3. one of a pair: I can't find the mate to this glove.
4. a counterpart.
5. an associate; fellow worker; comrade; partner (often used in combination): classmate; roommate.
6. friend; buddy; pal (often used as an informal term of address): Let me give you a hand with that, mate.
7. Nautical.
a. first mate.
b. any of a number of officers of varying degrees of rank subordinate to the master of a merchant ship.
c. an assistant to a warrant officer or other functionary on a ship.
8. an aide or helper, as to an artisan; factotum.
9. a gear, rack, or worm engaging with another gear or worm.
10. Archaic. an equal in reputation; peer; match.
–verb (used with object)
11. to join as a mate or as mates.
12. to bring (animals) together for breeding purposes.
13. to match or marry.
14. to join, fit, or associate suitably: to mate thought with daring action.
15. to connect or link: a telephone system mated to a computerized information service.
16. to treat as comparable.
–verb (used without object)
17. to associate as a mate or as mates.
18. (of animals) to copulate.
19. (of animals) to pair for the purpose of breeding.
20. to marry.
21. (of a gear, rack, or worm) to engage with another gear or worm; mesh.
22. Archaic. to consort; keep company.

OK, it is not that bad considering the meaning are related, the reality is probably the Brits use it because they were a big naval nation thus a lot of sailors. On the other hand the other interpretation of the word might be an indication on what they did in the ships. I mean think about it, no girls, months at sea, you do the maths ;P.
The funny thing is they don't find it weird at all, this words double meaning is completely ignored, which is quite strange considering the Brits usual sarcasm.
Well anyway, just a thought that occurred to me once, and today the bus driver did said "cheers mate", so guess why I am sharing ;P.

The weather (don't be hasty about the topic just read it :P)

The absence of what to write about is always tricky to handle. Don't have anything to say? LOL, of course I do, we are talking about me ;). The thing is I don't see a subject that stands up for me to write about, ohh well.
The weather would be a good topic I am in England, and no it is not to talk about the weather although it is fucking cold. The thing is here it is common to discuss the weather, which simply sounds like people have nothing else to talk about. At least this is what I thought before living here, I mean English are a bit distant thus you'd assume that the topics of conversation are trivial and uninteresting like the weather.
The thing is if you live in a country with the most random weather, mostly bad weather, where to be sunny means to be cold, well the topic has a certain interest. This is particularly true when you have good news about it, like this weekend not rain, for the brits this means barbecue time, well not now, it is too cold for it. Well at least I think not even they would do barbecues with this weather. Then again you never know, yesterday went to see a football game, Nottingham Forrest Vs Ipswich Town, it was freezing, like really freezing, and there where some dudes in shorts and flip flops. The British coat is something I will never understand, after all other people also drink alcohol, and yet they are more, well lets say normal in the global reality ;P.

The second day...

The day after some say is the most important day, for great events, for change, new cycles, even in romances. I mean the first kiss is easy, the awkward part comes the second time you meet, of course you don't talk about it, you have been close to this person but should you assume things? Well you get the picture.
Strangely enough, or not, my work volume was reduced, like I said in the days of change it is complicated to actually do things, that comes on the next days ;P (also a nice excuse, you don't have to thank me ;P).
Nevertheless work seen a bit trivial, and considering I am doing a PhD this is a harsh statement :P. The thing is I obviously had to consider many things after reacting, see one thing you always should do is react, even if it is a choice not to react, but you should first take care of the matter at hand. Once this is done you are free to proceed to see the winder picture and the effects of recent events on it. It is like first you take care of the pain that is present, and then you proceed to prevent future pains. Bare in mind this is simply an analogy.
What troubles me is not events, but my view over them, namely how this view is affected by my current state of events. This is a bit of a problem because I like to think of myself as a constant (not that it is possible to be one ;P), or at least a logical variable. Thus I try to keep circumstances from affecting my core, and although this core is not affect, it is demonstrated how I let at other times circumstances dictate certain things on the outskirts of my world. Sounds harmless I know, but if you have the en sight to see further into the small decisions, well the butterfly effect is there for a reason. For those who aren't familiar with this, basically it states that the clapping of the butterfly wings can case a hurricane on the other side of the world. So basically how the small things can be key to enable big events, thus providing the unpredictability of all things. Now that the background knowledge is set, I must say that I know this to be true, but I also am one of those who tries to predict and model things. Obviously this is done in within limits and not in detail. Anyway back to the point, I could see things evolving in a certain fashion and at the time I choose the puristic approach. What does this mean, well it means I used the approach if things are to work, well they should work without interference. A time of my life that I thought playing good made things less valuable, in a way I still do but that is content for another post.
People don't change? Well I think people do change, not at core, at least most of the times, but they evolve and to evolve you need to change. For better or worst is only in the eye of the beholder. Thus things are as they are, but doesn't mean they can't evolve and therefore change.
Well I think it is enough for a second day post, from Nottingham to the world "Hello World : day two " ;P

A new cycle...

Hello world!! A very common sentence in computer science, it is the statement that new pieces of code might say to show that they are present :P. Today I was planing a small update of the blog and pretty much that was my intent for the day. Obviously posting something was also part of this intent. I am entering a new cycle at work since the project I was involved in had its last general assembly last week. So what does that mean? Well it means I only have minor obligations on it from now until the official finish. So good news for my PhD, because it was really falling behind.
This also means that my work load will be more targeted to my personal work which gives me less of an excuse not to write in the blog. I know that I could have wrote much more than I did lately, regardless of the attenuating circumstances but that is behind now, I do need a new cycle all around (And circumstances aligned to provide just that, see why I say I am generally lucky :P).
Before I go any further I want to do a quick update on my trip to Switzerland. So first I need to set my state of mind which was shit work wise, honestly I was feeling a bit fed up of the whole research scene, plus feeling completely out of place, I mean is my work that important? Surely not... But I was going to present it in a meeting for all the partners plus the project evaluator, bare in mind that is the work I did in the project not the work for my PhD (Although it is related). I was feeling like I do at times, why not just quit and become something simple like a fishermen? Specially in a nice place like tropical island, or Thailand, wouldn't that be nice? A hut by the beach in a simple life without technology...
So this was the background before the meeting, as someone put it yesterday, as a responsible person I went to the meeting. It is not that I am that responsible, but if I assume a commitment, well it takes a lot for me to break it (I am just putting the possibility just not to seem too arrogant, in fact I don't break it :P).
The meeting was good for more than one reason, firstly the things I presented where very well accepted, secondly the questions and comments actually validated my PhD work. So all in all it was great for the meeting, and as the cherry on top of the cake (for those who like cherries :P) the last day there was a special session with an expert on Agent Technology (Which I am using in my PhD) that had dinner in my table so we got to discuss a few things which gave me a new bust PhD wise. So all in all a very positive meeting in Switzerland, except the place is really dull, I mean really really dull :P.
So I got back and took a day out to see if got well from my cold, right forgot to mention that I had a cold during the days going into the meeting and during the meeting a huge cough as well.
A day of vegetation, plus the weekend, well I am ready for a new start. Got to the office, and got a surprise, but before that just a quick note to Joao I want to go back so if you want help just let me know ;).
The big surprise, well I got add on MSN by an old friend, friend might be a strong word, although I still think of him as a friend but following his rules on the matter not my own, well that is a bit unfair, lets say I follow what is more convenient case by case. The fact is we are not friends, which is one of those things that you don't really like to realize but it is the blunt truth. This was my best friend, thus this makes it a harsh realization.
A little background knowledge is probably required, without going into much detail the problem was and is a girl. LOL, it is funny, he once told me "girls ruin everything", well I never said he didn't have got insight.
Anyway, the thing is we haven spoken in years, like over 3 years, and today he added me to MSN selectively. What does selectively mean? Well it means he didn't do it to all of his contacts from his previous account. This puts me in a awkward position since it breaks the precedent of contact. Right another background into this, I don't close communication bridges, so people can always reach me, but I am a very proud person and as such I do not initiate contact when there is a precedent of me trying to reach out and getting nothing in return. That is simply how it is, I mean i haven't spoken with my dad in over 10 years, that should tell you something...
So the thing with this is, well the precedent is broken considering it was a selective thing (how do I know this, well I have ways ;P).
That leaves me with two options, a proactive response or a reactive response. Obviously I accepted the invitation, but that is simply allowing for the communication Chanel to exist, the use of it is another matter. I could now expose all that I am considering for his reasons, he is a person that would consider such thing in detail, so... The thing is one wants to hope for the best, maybe he is reaching out, but reason tells me that this is such a delicate matter that it will depend so much on the next steps.
The thing is reactive would be just to wait and see, perhaps the communication Chanel will decay again (I have a theory on this, the more a communication Chanel is not used, the more likely it is that it will never be used). The thing is this is the most likely event because in his mind this might be as far as he will go to reach out, the question is what do I feel about it? This is what one of my friends just asked me, you are positively surprised or not? Well I don't know, it is a bit unexpected, I had come to terms to how things where, not that I like them, simply accepted that some things in life are not good. So I have to say positively surprised, but, and there is always a but, this is quite complicated waters, taking this matter on will have huge impacts all around from what i can foresee, and yet I wonder... Well it is obvious that I will react to this, he knows this, but I am simply building the argument towards doing so. There is no precedent, thus no excuse, proactive is the only option, I am curious about it and as a curious person I intend to test the waters. How? Well this post is a way to start it is called a new cycle for different reasons, but perhaps other things have aligned toward a more complete new cycle. I'll keep you posted (Or perhaps there will be a comment on the matter)...

In My Place

Well I am back in the UK, but that is not the reason for this title. I found this song on my last trip to Portugal, and honestly I think it should be shared, it is strangely catchy. One of the youtube make artists, thus I make it a bigger point to promote it.
On a more personal note, I am back to my place, not that I wasn't in my place, but for now it is clear here is where I should be. Don't want to make a big post, just wanted to drop a line, my trip was fine and served its purpose and now, well ... In My Place...


Don't run away,
if you know that
you've got what it takes.
Don't shy away.
Sleep now,
dream here.
And hopefully the night
will release your fear.

There will be tears to shed again.
Time to begin, and time to end.
Baby, and you say I'll be sad,
but that depends.

Baby now,
come on recognize me,
I know that you know my face.
Weren't you the one who told me once you would be there?
And everytime I try to walk away,
you keep me in my place.
I try to break away but I'm much too much too scared.
Yeah, I try to break away but I'm much too much too scared.

Yeahhh...

Think your chance.
Cause life will grant you one
and that's your last.
Baby, don't think too fast.
No, no.
Cause you can't have mine,
cause all I do is move you 'round in time.


Baby, there will be nights to sleep alone.
Time to fight, and time to grow.
Baby, and you say I'll be sad,
but you don't know.

Whoahhh.

Baby now,
come on recognize me,
I know that you know my face.
Weren't you the one who told me once you would be there?
And everytime I try to walk away,
you keep me in my place.
I try to break away but I'm much too much too scared.
Yeah, I try to break away but I'm much too much too scared.
Baby, I try to break away but I'm much too much too scared.
(Baby, I'm much too scared.)
Yeahhh.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So come on recognize me,
I know that you know my face.
Weren't you the one who told me once you would be there?
And everytime I try to walk away,
you keep me in my place.
I try to break away but I'm much too much too scared.
Yeah, I try to break away but I'm much too much too scared.
Baby now, I try to break away but I'm much too much too scared.

Move you 'round in time.
Move you 'round in time.

Insomniac

Perhaps a miss use of this word, but I start with it and probably finish with it. I am feeling a strange unease, something disturbing me in my mind, yet it feels like a faint whisper that I can't really understand, like something I should clearly be able to see and yet eludes me in a concrete fashion. This sort of feeling is quite disturbing, so it is not that I can't sleep, I guess if I lay in my bed long enough I would sleep and once I am asleep, well I would only wake up either for a reason or because I have rested enough. Perhaps this is what I should do, and yet I thought of writing a bit, well this is not really true since I first read some posts of a blog very close to my heart. Nevertheless I am writing because it makes sense to try and make sense of my unease, normally at times like this I would dig and dissect all things in my head, all possibilities, probably would find some new solutions for some of the problems I have (although these might simply be interferences in other worlds, which I am trying to avoid in general). It is like I don't want to go to sleep because I have something to do, the only problem is I don't know what it is. This is rather pointless because I end up losing time, eventually giving up and going to sleep, but because I have things to do the next day, well I end up being tired for the whole day and yet when the time to go to bed comes again, well the cycle starts again.
BAhh, this is a quite frustrating feeling, not sure if I should just skip the sleep, read a bit perhaps, maybe see all the TV series I have in my queue, because honestly I don't see what I need to do, or what I could do at a time like this. The actions that could appease this are out of reach, and they would only comfort me thus the enigma of it all would still exist.
I am at times a troubled soul, and yet I don't see it now, but I feel a bit weird about it. Sounds idiotic I know but sometime we need to state things beyond logic to perhaps feel more human, more than simple logic, more than simple self. Perhaps it is just complicating the simple, perhaps this is just another ranting of a "very simple person in a very complex way" (one of my best quotes ever, truly awesome).
The Portugal trip is almost over, it seems more and more like my influence over the worlds here is rather reduced, not sure how this affects me, but I did intend for this in a way anyway. But I don't want to go there.
The right and wrong of things, the haziness of all the shades of grey is simply too clear to ignore. Honestly I feel lost in actions at times, knowing some things for sure doesn't help much, the devil is in the detail, there are so many ways to achieve our goals...
I am sure I want to be in Nottingham right now, but not really sure if for the same reasons that I wanted to be there before, perhaps it is this. I am not sure if you notice I am actually dissecting possibilities, which is not the point :P, sorry my mind is tricky to control, as such I'll force it to shut down, Goodnight you all...